The following is a little comedy bit I wrote when I was running SDG Creative that never got used. There is something unique about it besides being generally delightful. See if you can spot it, I'll reveal at the end.
G: Stuart! How are you doing buddy?
S: Don't ask, Gerard, the answer isn't fit for polite company.
G: Go on, it can't be that bad! What can I do to make your day better?
S: So glad you asked! You can tell me you have a couple gold ingots available. Maybe even a half brick. I have a whale of an order and nowhere near enough gold.
G: Do I have gold? Of course I have gold. I'm a conveniently well supplied purveyor of oddities and essentials. I always have exactly what you need
S: Good, I need a lot of gold for this order.
G: Say no more you surly dove, one half of one gold brick coming up. Is there anything else I can get you?
S: Don't call me that.
G: Gee, I meant no offense.
S: (in a surly manner) Seems like everyone thinks I'm surly. The surly dove gold smith they call me. I'm not surly, I'm a sweet, delightful guy. You can only take so much though, ya'know? I'm a six ounce bird that works with fire and precious metal everyday. That is pretty impressive, don't you think?
G: Decidedly so.
S: Guess it's not impressive enough. No one cares about my singed feathers, my ulcerative colitis, or the fact that I have sixteen breaks to feed.
G: Sixteen? That's an awful lot. I thought doves only had two children at a time.
S: Doctor Gregory put Susan on this experimental hormone therapy that was supposed to cure her runners knee so she could do the tough mudder next week.
G: Gosh, I had no idea Susan was so athletic.
S: Sure is, I met her at the Olympics. She had just won gold in the clean and jerk. I was the lucky sap who'd just smithied the gold medal she was to wear. It was mating season at first sight. I was all sooty from the forge, she was resplendent in her sequined weightlifting belt. I cooed, she cooed, it was great. Then she took some hormones and bam! A dozen eggs plus four spares. Now I gotta do these crazy giant jobs I ain't got no business doing!
G: Do tell. What kind of job are you working?
S: Gotta make a gold belly button ring… for a whale.
G: Seriously?
S: Darn tootin'
G: Golly, you weren't kidding, that is a whale of an order. Wait a minute, I've gotta ask...
S: See? You're wondering the exact same thing I did when I got the order aren't you?
G: Do whales even have belly buttons?
S: Gerard, that was exactly my first thought. I have no idea and I don't plan on asking. I just need to smith it, what they do with it afterwards is no business of mine.
G: Stuart, you're very wise, that'll be $375,000.
S: Done, can you have it delivered?
G: Glady.
S: Swell, see you later Gerard.
G: Don't be a stranger.
S: Gonna be hard pressed to be stranger than a surly dove gold smith making a belly button ring for a whale.
End
Notice anything special?
Years ago I began an endeavor called SDG Creative. SDG stands for Soli Deo Gloria which means "to God alone be the glory". Each line in the script above begins with S, D, and G successively!